Thursday, January 2, 2014

Total Shock

Wow…I'm still in shock.  Some days I don't even believe it…but then I get nauseous and it makes it a lot more real for me. 

So…in November my skin started breaking out like CRAZY!  I was so frustrated.  My skin only breaks out when I'm doing fertility treatments.  That was all finally over - so why in the heck is my skin breaking out again.  I told Curtis I wanted to go back on accutane or something.  I hate pimples.  It is such a confidence deflater.  In order to go back on accutane you have to take a pregnancy test.  I thought it was totally stupid that I had to do that.  I mean really?  Doesn't 5 rounds of failed IVF - and 2 more with a gestational carrier - make you exempt from pregnancy tests??  But I peed on a stick anyways - and bam - POSITIVE!!!
I almost fell to the floor.  There is absolutely no way.  I showed Curtis the test.  We both thought it was faulty.  It must have been old or something.  So he ran to the store and bought 5 more.  I peed on all 5.  And they all came back POSITIVE.  I still was in disbelief.  We both didn't know how to react.  How far along am I?  My last period was in September.  That would make me 10 weeks or something.  And there's just no way.  I was thinking I must be miscarrying.  I don't feel pregnant AT ALL.  
The next day I called an OBGYN and set an appointment.  A week later I went in and they had me pee on another stick that came back super positive.  It turned blue right away.  They didn't do an ultrasound, so I still was thinking…"Oh, it probably won't last very long."  (This is my pessimistic infertile mind thinking).  

I started spotting so I just knew I was miscarrying.  I just hoping I didn't have to have a D&C.  Those suck.  I went back a week later for an ultrasound and saw a little gummy bear with a freaking fluttering heartbeat.  Un-freaking-believable.  I have NEVER seen a heartbeat by myself.  Ever.  She put me at 6 weeks and said my last period was around October 20th.  That's impossible.  I didn't have a period the whole entire month of October.  I know that FOR SURE.  How in the heck did I ovulate without a period?  And how did Curtis' poor morphology sperm penetrate my random egg?  The fertility doctors told us that was impossible.  I seriously felt like Jim Carrey in Dumb and Dumber…"So you're telling me there's a chance???"  Haha…  I still don't understand how this all happened.  I mean…I know how babies are made, but for me a baby is made in a petri dish and implanted into another woman's uterus.  This just doesn't happen for us.  Obviously someone else had a hand in all this.  

I went in for another ultrasound at 8 weeks and saw that little stinker still growing strong.  I had another appointment today - and I'm 10 weeks, 2 days and still chugging along.  Around 7 weeks I got pretty nauseous.  Not throwing up, just nothing sounds good - except carbs.  Give me some curly fries and chips and I'm good to go.  I'm gonna get huge if I keep eating like this.  I've also been super tired, which doesn't mesh well when you have 8 month old triplets, but we just make it work.  

We are super excited!  We know life will be crazy with 4 kids ages 15 months and under, but my life is already crazy and we seem to manage.  I still don't understand why things happen the way they do…but I guess I'll never get it.  That's one question I'm gonna ask the man upstairs when I get there.  
This is how we told our family.

21 comments:

Christine Chioma said...

Gosh! I am so happy for you! What a miracle. You guys deserve the best. So many answered prayers!

Lizzy said...

Congratulations!! What a blessing for you!!! If you can handle 3 babies at once, 4 will be a piece of cake!! Good luck with the pregnancy. Seeing the changes your body goes through is an amazing journey. I love following you on Instagram and can't wait to follow your pregnancy on it!

Ryan.Kendra.Makenzie.Tracker said...

This is amazing!!! What a beautiful gift from God. I am so so happy for your family. You are incredible people and God has a special path for you!!

Kyle and Shallan said...

Kim, congrats!!!! I have followed your story from the beginning and that is amazing!!! If anyone can handle it, it's you! You guys have the cutest family I have ever seen and that is awesome. Miracles do happen! So glad to see you guys doing well. -Shallan

Rhonda Donnelly said...

Oh my goodness. I have chills. I love following your story because you can see first hand God's glorious work. This is truly amazing and a huge blessing. I can only imagine your mom and dad watching that video. God bless your beautiful, beautiful little family. Happy New Year Brown family. Hugs

Rhonda Donnelly said...

Oh my goodness. I have chills. I love following your story because you can see first hand God's glorious work. This is truly amazing and a huge blessing. I can only imagine your mom and dad watching that video. God bless your beautiful, beautiful little family. Happy New Year Brown family. Hugs

Alicia said...

So happy for you and your family! Heavenly Father has a special plan in mind for your cute family! Such a miracle! Congratulations!

Alice Anne said...

THAT IS SO FRIGGIN AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!

Katie Muenzer said...

Wow this is amazing :) God is Sooo good! Hope you feel better! There is nothing more special during pregnancy than to feel the movement of your unborn child! I am so happy & over joyed for you Kim Brown

The Winkelman's said...

Kim!!! I wish I could have seen your families reaction when they found out... I can only imagine!! So incredible and insane. Congrats and good luck! I'm so happy for you.

The Winkelman's said...

Kim!!! I wish I could have seen your families reaction when they found out... I can only imagine!! So incredible and insane. Congrats and good luck! I'm so happy for you.

Desiree said...

Love this! Congrats!! I think Heavenly Father is a comedian! And a miracle worker. You will have 4 beautiful miracles! So happy for you!

Lindsey Wolfe said...

That is amazing!! You have no idea who I am, but I found your blog months ago and enjoy following your story. My dear friend had many many MANY failed IVF and then finally put a boy and girl in and the girl split into identical twins! Then when the triplets were 13 months she got pregnant on their own and have another baby girl! What a GREAT GREAT blessing! CONGRATS!

Chantel said...

I am a podiatrist and was watching some training on Controlled Substance Abuse that is required for my medical license. I was scrolling through blogs on another browser at the same time. I read yours and yelled, "Holy crap" and my husband came running in wanting to know what was so exciting on my drug course. It was so funny. I am so excited for you. This is amazing!!!

Kate O'Connor said...

OMG! Amazing! Congrats!! I am so so happy for you! Im sure its a bit nerve wracking but you guys will be great! I can't wait to follow :)

Krystal said...

Oh my goodness!! How exciting / crazy is that?! I've been following your story ever since I saw you featured on the news a while back. Good luck with the pregnancy!!

Kayla said...

Your video made me a little teary :). Love the song and picture choices. I have been following your story for quite some time, and I'm so excited for you!

AmbertheGreat said...

So excited for you and your family!!!

dothetubeyou said...

Kim, I found your blog when googling Dr. Marrs bc after years of failed trying and IUIs were starting the ivf journey. The night I found your blog I stayed up for hours reading. I couldnt believe your journey and how many trials you went thru. In (what I thought was the end) I thought how beautiful it turned out with just so much love between your family and triplets!!(Your sis-in-law is truly amazing!) Today I revisited your blog to refresh myself on whats to come with ivf meds etc and couldn't believe it when I saw this post! Amazing, beautiful, wonderful, hopeful and inspiring and just filled me with hope. Im so happy for you guys. Both you and Curtis are wonderful people and your kids look so happy and adorable!! Wishing you all the happiness in the world! Hopefully ill be following in your pregnancy footsteps next month!! Hugs from S. CA

dothetubeyou said...

Kim, I found your blog when googling Dr. Marrs bc after years of failed trying and IUIs were starting the ivf journey. The night I found your blog I stayed up for hours reading. I couldnt believe your journey and how many trials you went thru. In (what I thought was the end) I thought how beautiful it turned out with just so much love between your family and triplets!!(Your sis-in-law is truly amazing!) Today I revisited your blog to refresh myself on whats to come with ivf meds etc and couldn't believe it when I saw this post! Amazing, beautiful, wonderful, hopeful and inspiring and just filled me with hope. Im so happy for you guys. Both you and Curtis are wonderful people and your kids look so happy and adorable!! Wishing you all the happiness in the world! Hopefully ill be following in your pregnancy footsteps next month!! Hugs from S. CA

Suzanne said...

I just wanted to say hello. My surrogate sent me the link to your blog today. She's currently 25 weeks pregnant with our twins (conceived with donor eggs) after years of infertility and loss. We were given less than 1% chance at conceiving and we are now 7.5 weeks pregnant with a spontaneous pregnancy. I just wanted to say congratulations to another true miracle in the world. xoxox

www.ourjourneytoababybump.com